Getting Kids to Listen

“I’m going to write a blog on getting kids to listen” I told my kids.
“What?” My son said.
“I’m going to write...”
“That was a joke, Mom...”

The thing is, kids do listen and they do hear us. But they don’t always do what we ask, which is really the most important part of the listening, as far as we’re concerned.

You only have to say once where the cookies are and bang, they’ve got it. But try to get them out of the bath or into bed or to clean up the toys? Forget it. Kids don’t like to be told what to do any more than we do, which is why ordering them around often doesn’t end well.

To get kids to listen, sometimes all we have to do is a better job of asking. Our tone, our manner, our words, our volume and our timing are all key to increasing cooperation:

• Get down to their level, get their attention, say their name
• Look them in the eye, touch their shoulder
• Wait until they are fully focused, not distracted
• Say it with one word, say please – “Toys now please!”
• Say it calmly and quietly – even if you have to repeat yourself - but only once
• Respect what they are doing, give a transition warning – “Bath time in 5 minutes”
• Ask for their cooperation - “Johnny, I need some help with the toys, ok?”
• Say what you will do -“I’m starting story time, are you ready?”
• Give a small choice – “Do you want to brush your teeth before or after bath?”
• Write a list, or a picture list, with the routine on it – toys, teeth, bath, story, bed, hugs.

Hope their ears perk up!
Doone Estey
For more listening and cooperation tips, please consider one of our parenting courses – satisfaction guaranteed or your money back. www.parentingnetwork.ca